Last week in the blog, I provided a brief intro to Play Therapy so parents can understand the methods and approach utilized when working with their children. Oftentimes after I explain to parents about Play Therapy, I’m met with the question “can’t I just play on my own with my kids?”. To this, I say.. Yes! As a parent one of the most nourishing activities with your child is to engage with play which they lead and direct. This provides parents a lens into their child’s interests and strengths, which will be discussed more in next week’s blog! That said, the play between a parent and child is a relationship building activity and considered regular play, which is vastly different from therapeutic play.

So what is therapeutic play then? There are many different ways to integrate play into therapy but there are two main theoretical approaches: Directive play therapy and non-direct play therapy. In direct play therapy a therapist may plan games, activities, or worksheets which help facilitate skill development, processing different challenges, or increase insight within the child. The therapist trusts the child to heal themselves, but provides guidance and direction to the child. Direct play therapy relies heavily on the therapeutic relationship between child and therapist and communication between therapist and child. For this reason, most often direct child therapy approaches are best for children who are able to communicate well, typically age 5-6+. Non-direct play therapy is just as it sounds, non-direct. The modality trusts that when a child is introduced to a safe environment, which is comfortable and inviting, that they have the natural ability to process and heal through the activities of their choosing. As you will recall from last week’s blog post, Virginia Axiline was instrumental in the development of non-direct play therapy. Axiline felt that through having a space where a child is free of judgement and are capable of harnessing their own strengths, a child can feel empowered to conquer different challenges and obstacles. Non-directive play therapy is typically better for children who are pre-verbal or non-verbal as it allows them to communicate through play, or children who are younger than 6.

Like most approaches, therapists may blend modalities and methods together to provide child centered care which fits the child’s own needs. This may look like some focused sessions surrounding practicing coping skills, and other sessions where children engage in non-directive play to communicate their challenges with the therapist. In utilizing either approach, the therapist is doing much more than simply playing with the child. They are observing different behaviors, assessing how the child responds to barriers when confronted with them, identifying strengths, and most importantly empowering the child to be their true self.

All of this is to say as parents, you should definitely be playing with your kiddos, but your role is not as a therapist. A play therapist offers children time to be their true authentic selves, free of judgement, and allows their bodies and mind process in ways which are natural to them. A parent provides love and nurturing, is an example of the first attachment in a child’s life and shows how relationships and attachments in their lives should be. Play with your child may be recommended by your therapist to engage in outside of your sessions, and they may even provide different activities to try to help strengthen and secure your attachment with your child. Overall play is not only an excellent method for parents to use to communicate with their child, but also is therapeutic to helping your child. So play with your child and learn how they like to play, but don’t mistake it for the same value as therapeutic play.

Kaitlyn Lee, LICSWA
Charmed Counseling PLLC
Phone & Text: 509-606-0708
Fax: 509-232-5552