I wanted to share excerpts from an APA scholarly research paper I wrote in 2020 that explored the effects of divorce on children and adolescents specifically in the context of developing short-term and long-term psychopathology. At first my topic was solely about the development of Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD) or Conduct Disorder following a divorce, but after doing research I realized that those two disorders are only a small piece of possible psychopathology that needs to be explored more in detail. Each family’s story is different, and to just assume that divorce results in children not listening and acting out is not an appropriate conclusion. I included the development of psychopathology in the paper to emphasize the big impact divorce has, but also the importance of considering how divorce can serve as a protective factor in improving a child and family’s coping and communication skills over time. My research was geared towards trying to find articles that allowed me to learn about divorce through multiple lenses. I looked at articles that focused on communication styles, multiple generations being affected by the divorce, boundaries being broken during grieving/coping, and other aspects of the aftermath of divorce and how all of those topics can play a role in negatively affecting children and their development, specifically in terms of psychopathology.

Understanding the impact, a divorce can have on children and adolescents is not a one size fits all approach. Each family’s situation is different and needs to be treated uniquely to properly recognize the best way to help the family get through this tough time. Of equal importance is the action of assisting the family on how to grow from the divorce by leaning on one another for support rather than each member trying to cope individually. The effects of divorce can be discussed in any therapy setting (ex. family, group, individual, etc.) because each person in the family will be impacted differently. The family may not be made up of a traditional structure of two parents and biological children. With additional family members, other than just mom, dad, and children, living under the same roof as well as being raised in a non-traditional family structure (ex. same-sex parents, adopted children, foster families, etc.), there are additional factors to consider with divorce that could also play a role in possible development of psychopathology.

Here are some highlights from my research:

• Being able to explore a longer familial line of psychopathology following a divorce, rather than just looking at the parents and children, assists the therapist/counselor in gaining a better understanding of the unique impact of the divorce on the family and the predisposition for psychopathology in the children from learning more about the generations before the parents.

• It’s important to consider the journey of the parents finding a new romantic partner. The research showed that adolescents growing up in an environment that is labeled “not stable”, characterized by their mother actively seeking new partnerships/romances, reported lower levels of life satisfaction and higher chances of expressing depressive symptomatology. When the father is actively settled in a new stable relationship following the divorce, adolescents also report lower levels of life satisfaction and higher chances of developing depression. So not only is the transition of a child’s parents moving on stressful, but the experience of dating for mom versus dad has an effect as well.

• “Suffering”, as classified by symptomatology that could meet for a diagnosis, is not just an immediate reaction following the divorce. The effects can span months, or even years later. At some point, the parents will want to move on to explore other romantic relationships.

• Observing the family’s chosen coping mechanisms is crucial in understanding the development of possible psychopathology in children and adolescents. Sometimes the newly single divorced parent may turn to their children as a form of comfort and as a chance to express their negative feelings about the other parent. Not only is that child experiencing their own reactions to their parent’s separation (ex. grief, loss, anger, guilt, etc.), but they also have to navigate serving as a genuine listener to the parent expressing negative thoughts and beliefs about the other parent. These conversations could feel cathartic to the parent but could lead to short-term and long-term distress for the child. Even if the child is actively trying to stay strong for the parent, they could be experiencing physiological distress that could manifest into psychopathology later on in life without proper debriefing with their parents who are maintaining their appropriate role.

• Children are actively seeking more attention post-divorce from their parents to maintain feelings of love and affection. The amount and quality of attention provided to the child following the divorce are important in understanding the child’s behaviors. The want and need for attention from their parents following the traumatic event are important for the children or adolescents to feel as fulfilled as possible, even though their immediate social circle is no longer intact.

• The timing of the divorce is influential, especially when the children are adolescents and discovering their own romantic relationships. Outside of the divorce, other transitions may occur within a family unit (ex. a new sibling being born, a grandparent passing away, a family move to a new state, etc.) that requires everyone adjusting. Depending on when the change occurs plays a substantial role when considering the impact on the child. Ensuring appropriate debriefing within families following these significant dates can help memories not seem as painful, but rather joyful when learning to shift focus on the positive features rather than the negative ones.

• One article explained the process of observing and testing the physiological stress response of children in reaction to their parent’s communication style based on their marital status. This article brought families together (single, divorced, married) and had them discuss a “stressful” topic/problem solving sort of conversation, and the children had to rate their own perception of their parent’s communication competence, social support, and how they view conversations with their parents. The results showed if children perceived their parent’s communication style as “skilled, they were able to recover physiologically from a stressful interaction regardless of their parent’s marital status, but if they perceived their parent’s communication style as “less skilled” they showed greater reactions and a longer time recovering following a stressful interaction which was shown to be influenced by the parents being divorced.

• Finally, I found an article that discussed how parents need to be educated, specifically in a therapy setting. Taking the time to provide psychoeducation to parents in a family therapy setting could enlighten them to the short-term and long-term effects a divorce can have on them and their child. It’s crucial for the parents to maintain their role as a parental figure and keep that boundary present even though they feel they need to vent to the closest figure to them, which could be their children. Choosing not to maintain this boundary and parental role could lead to development of an unhealthy ego for the child. The newly “single parent” using their child as a buffer to vent ultimately could be detrimental to their child’s mental health.

If you have any questions about the specific references/sources used in my 2020 APA paper or would like to see a full copy of the research paper, please contact me at tiffany@charmedcounseling.com.